Thursday, November 27, 2008

Jam...

I was readIng a novel around a year ago. "A bag of bones" by Stephen KIng. The protagonIst there was a wrIter and I swear to the Holy Cows he suffered from , what they call a "WrIter's Block" for around 120 pages....!!!

It was a major task belIeve me, to get past those 120 pages. I slogged day and nIght for hIm to get over hIs dead wIfe and start wrItiIng. By the one hundredth page I thought I was suffeIng from a "Reader's Block" I couldn't go on a step further. But then I saw 'Courage the Cowardly Dog' on CN and I was InspIred. I went ahead wIth It and found out that the guy fInds a new babe wIth a kId In the country.

Well the story really took off from there. WIth a lots of twIsts and turns and a lot of "Spooky" actIon It had a bIttersweet endIng.

Why am I tellIng you all thIs?? I don't really know. I've been held on GunPoInt to wrIte somethIng. There's a lot goIng on at present...

1) India Is on a wInnIng streak agaInst England in the ODI serIes.

2) Its almost December and I've not yet seen wInter. One of the reasons I don't lIke B'bay. Btw Its been almost a year and a half... :(

3) "Job's a joke n I'm broke" is to be the background lIne of my professIonal lIfe.

4) I've been very '
happy happy gay gay' sInce quIte a few months now... but then "Dostana" released... and I've been very 'happy happy' sInce quIte a few months now.

5) I celebrated my bIrthday a few days back. StartIng It wIth a lovely wIsh, to cuttIng pastrIes to openIng gIfts to recIvIng awesome testImonIal to goIng out wIth a frIend to a dInner wIth the famIly.

6) I've been actIng very "out of the normal" these days. *detaIls not to be gIven* Most of you guys don't know me... and I thInk I'll run the rIsk of beIng mIsunderstood... If you know what I mean... ;)

7) Bombay (cuz I lIke It better than MumbaI) Is under a terrorIst attack. Its been more than 24 hours and the fIght Is stIll on. Its stupId and horrIble. The bIggest terrorIst attack on India tIll date.

8) I'm excIted about a lot of stuff, and more excIted about the others.

9) I'm tryIng to wrIte but I dunno why.. I can't.. MIght be sufferIng from a "WrIter's Block"...!!!


Just thought you should know..

Btw...
How ya doIn...?

Friday, November 14, 2008

The love of friendship and beyond.

I’ve had a lot of friends since childhood.And I’m not friends with all of them now.Some have got lost in time..some have disappeared with no excuses..and some..have been kicked out of my life.As I’ve grown older..The meaning of friendship has changed to me.When I was a kid..I needed a friend only to laugh along and talk to in school..As a grew older I needed frnds to go out with and share my stupid secrets with.And now..Being a 22 yr old..I need friends go be with me through all the ups and downs in my life.
Im a sensitive hopeless case at times.I have sky high expectations..and I get hurt easily..I hate explaining myself to just anyone and I hate not being understood by people who are close to me.
Things in my life relating to frndship are somehow blown outta proportion every now and then..and the shuffle mode between me and my friends is always almost on.Over the time..and now..I’ve failed to understand..that why do I fail at keeping friendships intact..Am I a sucker for attention?Or am I a case of retarded thinking?Or simply..someone who thinks a lot..Who expects a lot.
I’ve always thought that having a bunch of frnds around always..really close ones is always good than having a best friend.I haven’t really believed in the concept of a ‘best friend’ all my life..maybe it was an excuse of not being able to have one..or maybe I was to weak to admit that one of my all closest frnds was my favourite and best of the lot.

I'm in a transition state now..Where I am thinking that having a best friend than having a group of close friends might be a better idea.
It alteast saves the time u waste on being insecure and disgusted.And plus u do know whom to trust the most and whom to rely upon without thinking twice.It amuses me sometimes how drastically things change over a small period of time..of how we start to hate someone..and love someone in such a short span..
I wonder sometimes..what keeps friendship goin?Being vocal with the feelings?Being too emotive?Or being soft..Every now and then?I always thought friendship never needed testimonies…But then,people change over time..and I am people..What I have learnt is..Sometimes..just being there..is also not enough..
Im a lazy person..when I see something slipping away from my hands..I don’t bother to go catch it..I let fate play the game..Not that I wanna be miserable..I just hate to demand once I see its not required..and fate has been cruel and sarcastic..Well..most of the times..I have been lazy.
And the time when I have been anything but lazy..I’ve carried a notion that doing something for someone is obviously more important than mere talking.But my gradual realization has been that we all remember more of what people say or have said..Than what they do..or have done..How ironic is that..
I guess sometimes being a poorer version of u saves u from hurting a higher version of you…
Its like coming to terms with life..
Trying not to expect when u wanna expect the most.
Playin along when you are retired hurt.



Well someday…I’m gonna call up all of my old friends..and get in touch..No matter what..but that day is not today..Today is a different day.And its not my day.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Mirror..!!!

so I am headIng back to my place after work. It was a nIce day at offIce. not much work. enjoyed chattIn wIth my colleagues. roamed around, drank a bIt to much coffee. so I am wIde awake. Its nIce and cozy today outsIde. pleasant breeze, a bIt chIllIng but the effect Is soothIng... too good. Its a perfect day. spIc & span. nothIng was gray today.


I'm thInkIng about her. an evenIng wIth her, dInner, some wIne and a bIt of dance. lovely...!


I'm almost there. headIng up the drIveway, I'm happy and content. the day has been amazIngly satIsfyIng.


I'm at the door now, pressIng the bell, waItIng ImpatIently to barg In and kIss her...


door opens and HE says "SurprIse...!"


I am shocked. shocked out of my wIts. What In the name of god...!! I cant belIeve It. I never thought thIs can happen. how can....
I'm losIng my grIp. Its hard to stand stIll.. Its gettIng dark... I cant see anythIng... n last thIng I heard was a thudd.. I was lyIng flat on my back...


Its not so hard to ImagIne my hysterIcal state. I bet you'd take It harder than I dId.

wanna know who answered the door??



It was ME...!